1/4 Pounder Review

Ok, so we are a quarter of the way home.  The winners have clearly separated from the losers at this point.  Winners so far are Feet State, Sultani, Knights (can’t believe my eyes) and Victory Brothers (really can’t believe my eyes).  Losers are Dorothy Mantooth, Jagshemash, Goodfellas and Dawgs (can’t believe my eyes).

This week we start inter-conference play so things will continue to get interesting.  Interesting match-ups include two 3 – 1 teams squaring off, Feet State at Victory Brothers.  Also, in the Persian Bowl, Cheeky Sharks are facing The Dunn Boys.  What is the over/under on the amount of money that will be wagered on this game?  I say $100 easy.  The Knights will smoke Big Pimpin.  I repeat, the Knights will smoke Big Pimpin and advance to a 5 – 0 start, wow.  Big smiles at Knights Park.

Great Draft Picks thus far:

Donovan McNabb – Cheeky Sharks, By far the best QB in the league and smoking Mannings, both of them.

Chad Pennington – Victory Brothers, 6th best QB in the league and has yet to start one game.

David Carr – Jagshemash, 7th best QB in the league, who would have thunk?

Charlie Frye – Knights, 8th best QB in league, wow

Brian Westbrook – Feet State, Best RB in league even though he missed a game.

Rudi Johnson – Feet State, Jiminy Christmas, does Mike have the 2 best RBs in the league?

Steven Jackson – Knights, SJax is getting it down.

Frank Gore – Knights, Jiminy Christmas, does Scott have the next 2 best RBs in the league?  Quite possibly the pick of the draft.

Laurence Maroney – Knights, Wow, Knights really boosted the RB scouting department.  3 out of the top 10 best RBs in the league.

Andre Johnson – The Dunn Boys, Come back year for AJ.

Marques Colston – Old Spicy, Great pick up for Spicy.  This guy looks like the real deal.  No wonder Donte was flinged to Philadelphia via his rubber band hammys.

Bernard Berrian – Feet State, Another great pick-up

Kellen Winslow – The Franchise, Finally, this guy doesn’t crash into something and becomes the best TE in the league.

Busts

Daunte Culpepper – 22nd best QB
Kurt Warner – 18th best QB and out of work
Drew Bledsoe – 23rd best QB with TO
Jake Plummer – 29th best QB with starting weeks of 1.5 and 5.9

Tiki Barber – 25th best RB.  Never go against your team Nima.
Lamont Jordan – 36th best RB.  Fatass.
Cadillac Williams – 41st best RB.  This Cadillac is stalled.

Larry Fitzgerald – 21st best WR.  Hopes, dreams, wishes, down the drain.
Anquan Boldin – 25th best WR.  See above.
Plaxico Burress – 29th best WR.  Idiot.

Bad Luck

Dorothy Mantooth being 1 – 3 in a tough division with an average of 104.8 points against.

The Franchise in that same division leading the league in total points but only managing a 2 – 2 record.

Jagshemash having 3 coulda wons if he only started the right players.

Good Luck

Victory Brothers being 3 – 1 averaging only 82.4 points for.

Sultani having 3 woulda losts  but starting the right players.

Questions

Valley

It’s a 5 to 6 horse race with only 4 slots.  Which team steps up to get that last remaining playoff spot.  I project Feet State, Sultani and The Franchise as the favorites.  That leaves Cheeky Sharks, Dy-No-Mite and Big Pimpin on the outside looking in.  Only one of those 3 will advance to the playoffs if my three favorites qualify.

City

How far will the Knights go undefeated?  Which Astor will make it to the playoffs.  Will a Lessem squeak in?  Do the Victory Brothers have what it takes to win the division?

Power Rank

Knights are top of the food chain?  Wow.  Cheeky Sharks come back to earth after talking a whole wallop of jibberish crap about how good their team is.  

Confidence Pool

Tony leads with 41 correct.  Best ESPN analyst is Mark Schlereth with 40 wins.  

Survivor Pool

All teams still alive.

Good luck.  Please visit the links to the right to give the commish a couple shekels.

Game Over Man...

As I predicted at the outset of the season, Jordan’s Dawgs are the strongest team out there, by a mile.  Jordan is averaging an incredible 130 points per week.  They also have a good chance to sweep both total points and head-to-head, a feat I thought we would not see for a while after my SuperCats did it two years ago.  Congrats Jordan.

The Valley remains a tight playoff race with Dunn Boys, Silent Treatment and Old Spicy angling for the remaining two playoff spots.  The remaining conference participants, Chancellor’s Lackey, Knights and Big Pimpin all need a miracle.  I say see yous next year.

In the City conference, Seth’s Sexpots sit atop the group followed closely by my SuperCats and Tony’s GoodFellas.  Casa Vito representing.  I asked Tony how badly he wanted to make the playoffs and he told me, “A little bit, little bit.”  

Both Tony and I are still duking it out over in the Survivor Pool, going on seven weeks now.  Tony almost got me when the Steelers nearly lost to the Jaguars on Monday night.  

Over in the NFL Pick ‘em league, surprise surprise, the two greatest handicappers this city has seen are deadlocked, Jason/David and I, of Bottle Rockets fame.  This one will go down to the wire.  Tony trails us by two games.  

One interesting match-up this week; Dunn Boys vs. Silent Treatment will help see who gets the edge of the last playoff spot in the Valley.  

Inside the Numbers: Jordan is one full week ahead of all teams.  Check out this bar chart: http://football25.myfantasyleague.com/2005/options?L=39488&O=20.  Seth has gotten almost as many points from his QB as he has from his three wide receivers.  

Go get ‘em.

First deal of the basketball fantasy league

Seth, ever the wheeler dealer makes his first deal before the season starts. Casa Vito is proud to join the Schur fantasy dynasty. (Not pictured, Victor) 

Things are getting clearer...

Five weeks down and things are getting a lot clearer.  First off, the Angels suck.  Secondly, I told you at the outset, the Dawgs are the team to beat, and they are.  Third, if I am the commish of this league in 2006, it will be as the commish of an auction league.  Fourth, ah fuck it, leave it at three.  

Let’s look at the conferences.  First off, the City.  Sethie is sitting pretty overlooking the City at 3-1.  He’s a contender and we’ll see him in the playoffs.  Cheeky Sharks and GoodFellas round out the remaining playoff spots, both at 2-2.  Kosher Dog is leading the conference is total points but last in head-to-head.  Dem be the breaks.  Surf or ski on that team, he scored 33 this week. Dy-No-Mite, I’d like to re-welcome you to Falaffel.  Jason tried to tell you this was no joke.  In fact, wait till the auction draft next year. (  

In the Valley Conference, the Lessem Brothers are running away with things, especially Jordan.  646.5 points after 5 weeks is incredible.  He’s averaging 129.3 a week, without his top wide receiver?  Jeremy shares a 4-1 record with him as does Nima though my bet is at least one of those teams loses next weekend.  I have already pointed to left field on the message board over Nima.  Spicy remains in the thick of things at 3-2.  Knights and Pimpin are D-E-A-D.  Rich is an also ran at this point though that may change.

The upcoming schedule is all inter-conference.

1/3 Season Awards

Best QB: Bulger – Cheeky Sharks
Best RB: LT – Sexpots
Best WR: Steve Smith – Dawgs
Best TE:  Gates – Cheeky Sharks
Best K  :  Rackers – Sexpots
Best D  :  Colts – Knights
Best Team: Dawgs
Worst Team: Big Pimpin

Bust-O-Rama
P. Manning, Culpepper, Deuce, Rudi, Priest, Clinton, Jamal, Kevin Jones, Ahman, A. Johnson, Harrison, Wayne, Muhammad, Horn, Gonzalez.

Out of their Gord
Palmer, E. Manning, Westbrook, Cadillac, S. Smith, Fitzgerald, Sherry Glenn, Rackers.

Three teams left in Survivor Pool 2 and they have almost all made the same picks.  Things get interesting this week.

Pick ‘em league is very tight with only two points separating the six teams at the top.  

That’s it this week.  Go get ‘em!

Auction Draft next year

It is my pleasure to announce that the Falaffel league will become an Auction Draft league in 2006.  Details to follow.

Survivor Pool winner enjoying your money. 

New Red Sox fan 

Take me out to the ballgame. I know, wrong sport but still, very cool. Go Yanks! 

Rule Update

Weekly trades can be made up to 5pm each Friday (for weeks with games starting Sunday) and 5pm each Tuesday (for weeks with games starting Thursday).  This is to allow owners a chance to accept or veto the trade.